Shaking it off

For the past couple of weeks I have been feeling sad. I have spent a lot of time eating, sleeping, and some time crying. I wouldn't say that I am depressed but I definitely have not been myself. Now don't get me wrong, I think I am a very optimistic person and am very appreciative and thankful of all the wonderful gifts in my life. I just think this adoption process has been harder on me emotionally than I thought it would be. Getting my hopes up and then being disappointed so many times is beginning to take its toll.

Finally this past Friday I chose to shake it off and to shift my thinking. Clinton and I went to dinner Friday night at a very nice restaurant overlooking the Pacific Ocean to officially celebrate our anniversary and we spent an awesome day together yesterday. I also decided to go back to church today ( it has been a few weeks since I have been) and to focus more on eating healthy and exercising ( it has been months since I have been to the gym). I am pleased to say that I worked out this morning before going to church. On the way to church I was listening to last weeks message on CD ( thanks to a coworker). On it Rick was talking about instant gratification. I was thinking how true this is of our society. I guess this whole adoption process is teaching me about patience, perseverance, and that the truly good things in life are worth waiting for. I am thankful for the gifts of these lessons. I know in my heart that Clinton and I are meant to be parents and we will persevere until our dream becomes a reality. God will give us our children in his own time.

Clinton and I have coached many leadership programs. During these programs the coaches as well as the students create a Letter of Accomplishment ( LOA). It basically is a list of your goals and objectives in the areas of Community, Relationships, Health, Career, Family, Finance and Recreation for the next 90 days. Only they are not just regular goals but goals that seem unreasonable and some what unattainable. The purpose is to see what you can create in your life in a short amount of time. I feel that an LOA is just what I need right now. It keeps me focused and I always blow myself away with what I am able to accomplish. I will create my LOA this evening and see what happens! I will share more with you as it unfolds...